Showtime’s Weeds totally sucks, man. It’s so boring it’ll kill at least 7-billion brain cells by watching just one episode, man. Don’t do it! You know how many brain cells you’d kill if you smoked just one joint? Who fucking cares, right? Anyhow this, Weeds, show ain’t Stuff Stoners Like…shit it ain’t even for stoners. Weeds if for people who LOVE money more than they LOVE weed. Because that’s exactly what the show is about…a bunch of assholes who LOVE MONEY MORE THAN WEED! So what if there’s some greedy hot chick on the show? Everyone digs hot chicks…even hot chicks dig hot chicks. But, there are all kinds of hot pot chicks all over television, man. Remember Dukes of Hazzard with that stoned chick who’d wear denim panties all the time? She was hot. Terry from Three’s Company sold weed down at the Regal Beagle and was a super hottie. And c’mon, you couldn’t have tuned in to a single fucking game show in the past couple of decades, like Card Sharks, or The Price is Right, or our fave High Rollers without seeing some hot chicks who made their living pointing at shit while stoned. If we’re gonna pay for tv we’d way rather watch HBO’s Flight of the Conchords because those dudes are always baked, they’re funny as hell and that show is waaaay more stoney than Weeds, plus, they’ve got a really hot chick on there too. (hey there Mel, er…uhm…beautiful Kristen Schaal…call us)
Weeds perpetuates harmful stereotypes just like DEA agents, marijuana prohibitionists, US President’s with the last name Bush, and that one fucking hold-out dentist motherfucker who still thinks Trident Sugarless Gum causes cavities! We’d do some research to flush out and list those negative stereotypes and then proceed to make fun of ‘em, but we’ve never really watched an episode of Weeds. So instead we just did a Google search and stole some other haters’ shit and pasted it here to make our point. “The black mother is a large, domineering woman who rules the roost with pithy snark, the black daughter is a young, unwed mother with a surly attitude, the black son is a drugdealer, the Hispanic woman is a maid, the Hispanic man is a drugdealer, the young Indian guy works at Quikeemart and is a neutered, clueless naif, the young white son is a smart but awkward loser, the Jewish uncle is a conniving parasite, and the Jewish uncle’s love interest is a pretty, but masculine, militaristic Israeli.” Judging from all that judging going on we can’t really tell if Weeds is a revolutionary new kind of programing or KKK propaganda (or both).
But, we’ve payed enough attention to realize that Weeds, however, ain’t doing shit to progress the legalization movement, man. They’re just trying to cash in on and market to stoners like Jack in the Box did with those lame-ass commercials featuring some stoner gettin’ all confused at the drive-up. And, sadly, because of the popularity of weed nowadays Weeds seems to have a lot of cultural capital at the moment which annoys the shit outta stoners! It’s a shame that Weeds really isn’t keeping up with the times, man, because cute suburban soccer mom’s in 13 states across the nation are selling and growing weed…LEGALLY! (Wouldn’t it be much cooler to focus on legally-run marijuana dispensaries? Oh you agree? Well, check out our MarijuanaLogues “the confesions of a legal stoner”.)
What’s really frightening about Weeds is how it spreads insideous misinformation about marijuana and undermines the marijuna movement PLUS casts stoners in a negative light. According to wiki/Weeds_(TV_series) the main character “Nancy Botwin was a loving, benevolent, all-American PTA soccer mom until her husband Judah suddenly dropped dead. To maintain the suburban lifestyle to which she was accustomed, Nancy entered the dangerous world of drug dealing. Her regular clients include…blah blah blah”.
Dangerous world of drug dealing? We thought the show was about selling WEED not DRUGS! How fucking destructive! We’ve been fighting marijuana prohibition and that Reefer Madness mentality since the fucking 30′s and language like this does nothing but DESTROY our efforts. Marijuana is MEDICINE! The American Medical Association recently reversed its position on marijuana and has urged the FEDS to support investigation and clinical research on weed for medicinal use and to reassess weed’s Schedule I controlled substance categorization.
So FUCK YOU WEEDS! Fuck you for perpetuating harmful stereotypes that damage all the hardwork we’ve all done to spread the truth about marijuana and our efforts to get the best medication on Earth into the hands of those who need it!
Q: Number of brain cells lost watching an episode of Weeds? A: 7 billion
Q: Number of brain cells lost smoking weed? A: 0