When we first met Thomas Newman, the Canadian filmmaker responsible for the epic, cult hit “Bong Of The Dead” a film depicting 2 best friends who turn zombies into fertilizer for growing potent weed, Newman was busy pounding the pavement getting the word out about his killer flick and his struggles as an indie filmmaker.
A day later Newman was fighting the battle of his life, not defending himself from stoned, brain devouring Zombies with munchies…but battling pirates! “I’ve been really busy since we last spoke. Since then, my fucking movie has been pirated and on every major torrent site! And, some low-life piece of shit who owns a whack of fake online poster printing businesses has stolen ALL my poster art and is selling it on Amazon, Sears and eBay!’
So far Newman’s artwork has been removed from Amazon and Sears due to copyright infringement and despite his struggles the film was selected as part of the Cannes Independent Film Festival official selection (CANNES) and premiered in France at the festival on MAY 12th and 14th. It also premiered on May 15th in Vancouver BC, at the Rio Theatre. And, recently the flick received global distribution from Germany and Australia to the USA and the UK! But, is it any good. Well according to Tommy Chong, the film, “is a sure winner”, he confirms.
Having the opportunity to interview a successful stoner/indy-filmaker, not to mention zombie-expert, doesn’t occur every day…so we took full-advantage of the situation and asked a bunch of Q’s.
STUFF STONERS LIKE: If there’s one thing that keeps us up at night it is what the fuck would society do if Chuck Norris becomes a zombie? It’d be impossible to defeat a zombie Chuck Norris, right?
THOMAS NEWMAN: I beg to differ! I would like to believe that if there’s room for a zombie Chuck Norris then clearly there must be room for a zombie Bruce Lee! Everyone knows that Bruce Lee kicked Chuck Norris’s as in Return of The Dragon during the most epic ass-kicking scene in Kung Fu Cinema history! That’s a fight I would pay to se again, especially if this time biting and chomping flesh is allowed! Would be cool!!
THOMAS NEWMAN: I think the real reason is cabeza is not alive! Zombies love it when their prey fights back. I believe it’s the thrill of the hunt more than the feast itself. Cabeza is just dead meat, which really has no appeal if you’re a flesh eating dead thing.
STUFF STONERS LIKE: How does on actually become a zombie?
THOMAS NEWMAN: The best way to become a zombie is….graduate from high school, get a dead end job where you can be extremely miserable, abide all laws, pay your taxes and make sure you stay in debt so that you can never pursue a dream! WHAMO!! Instant zombie!
STUFF STONERS LIKE: How do zombies feel about legalization?
THOMAS NEWMAN: I think zombies are totally for it! Think about it…they already have an uncontrollable apatite for eating. Don’t you think if given the opportunity to enhance that hunger by getting high in public daily they would be all over it? One hit from the chronic and you have a super hungry, super pissed flesh eater on your hands. However it does slow them down a bit.
STUFF STONERS LIKE: Are there any vegan zombies or does becoming a zombie end any sort of PETA-like feelings?
THOMAS NEWMAN: There are no vegan zombies recorded to date as far as I’m aware. I think once the zombie virus takes over your body it changes your brains chemistry and the sudden urge for flesh takes over.
STUFF STONERS LIKE: How do Zombies feel about wearing fur?
THOMAS NEWMAN: I know zombies are sort of brain dead and like to eat human flesh with really bad table manners. However I don’t think that means they are STUPID! Anyone who wares fur and knows the suffering it causes innocent animals but still ware it, must be really, really, REALLY stupid! I believe studies have proven that a zombie, who smokes pot and is missing half its brain but can still function, showed a higher IQ when compared to people who ware fur. I saw it somewhere in a science magazine I think. Must be true right?
STUFF STONERS LIKE: There’s a poplar rumor floating out there and we figured you’d be the right guy to ask about this…Is Keith Richards a zombie?
THOMAS NEWMAN: You know I have been looking into that and based on my research I have concluded that Sarah Jessica Parker does look like a horse!! Yeah….sorry were we talking about Keith Richards?
STUFF STONERS LIKE: Which political party appeals most to zombies?
THOMAS NEWMAN: ALL OF THEM! Zombies love to eat and tare things apart more than any creature on earth! They also fucking hate politicians so that mixed with their hunger is like gasoline to fire! They become very angry when they encounter a politician knowing that they are ALL corrupt liars who are the purest evil. Zombies are deeply into politics believe it or not. However they are only interested in eating them because they know politicians are fat and greedy! Zombies fucking HATE taxes too!
THOMAS NEWMAN: Na Jesus was an asshole con artist who did cheap parlor tricks to try and impress simple town folk. He was a total narcissist too and was always trying to get all the attention. I don’t think the zombie community wanted him to ever join their ranks. Even with that whole, he dies then comes back in 3 days bullshit, which by the way was all mirrors and shit! Oh yeah I heard form someone who knew someone who told someone they know that Jesus liked to do magic tricks! That whole resurrection thing he did was just a cheap trick! The zombies didn’t give a shit though because he didn’t really come back from the dead. FAKE!
STUFF STONERS LIKE: Do zombies get the munchies when they smoke weed? Wait…do zombies even smoke weed? What sorta munchies do zombies prefer? Doritos like the rest of us?
THOMAS NEWMAN: Of course zombies smoke weed! Why do you think they’re always hungry?? I know plenty of zombies who smoke weed and they pretty much like ALL their munchies from flesh to pizza to whatever! They do really like Doritos because it crunches like bone! They love the sound and the taste.
STUFF STONERS LIKE: What are the top 3 thing people need to know about bong of the dead?
THOMAS NEWMAN: 1- I shot it with no studio support for only $5000. 2- Shot it in only 15 days with a single digital camera. 3- I did all of the post-production work myself from editing to color correction to digital effects to some sound design, Foley and on and on.
STUFF STONERS LIKE: Just how stoned were you when you came up with the idea for Bong of the Dead?
THOMAS NEWMAN: I don’t remember…
STUFF STONERS LIKE: What occurs more in the movie, scenes with the word “fuck”, scenes with weed, or scenes with nudity?
THOMAS NEWMAN: Definitely scenes with the word FUCK while smoking WEED! I did want to have more nudity but felt it was going to come across as trying too hard. I kept it full of BUD and BLOOD! Its really a film designed to appeal to a mass audience and not just pot lovers or zombie lovers or TIT lovers….Its for everyone who loves fun movies in general.
STUFF STONERS LIKE: Seems like being a zombie can bee painful. Do you think medical marijuana would be helpful to zombies? Maybe it could alleviate the aches and pains associate with being a flesh-eating zombie or some shit?
THOMAS NEWMAN: I imagine being a zombie can be discomforting with all the open wounds and puss oozing from every orifice. I think medicinal pot can definitely help them ease the pain a bit. However you may need a special strain that illuminates the munchies so they don’t go ape shit and eat their own arms!
END PART 1…stay tuned for the exciting conclusion tomorrow!
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