“Why don’t you get a job, Spicoli,” asks that asshole Brad. You know what Spicoli tells him? “What for…all I need are some tasty waves, a cool buzzz and I’m fine.” What stoner can argue with that shit? Who needs money when you’ve got a cool buzz, anyhow? Besides, Spicoli has plenty of money nowadays. He’s got serious cash flow from when he saved Brooke Shields from drowning, man. Spicoli’s pro’lly smoking a joint while ridding some tasty waves right now, dude. And you…you’re probably sitting in a cubicle reading this shit about him…wishing you were him. Or at least wishing you were smoking a joint.
Sure, lots of people think Spicoli is stupid. Case in point… Spicoli’s little brother, Curtis, thinks that he’s stupid, but he’s really just jealous because he ain’t got his own weed. Your average stupid high school kid who wrecks his friend’s brother’s 1978 Camero is due for an ass-kickin’…but not Jeff Spicoli, man…he’s smart enough to outsmart the car’s owner, Mr. Charles Jefferson the star quarterback at Ridgemont High. Spicoli blamed the destruction of Jefferson’s beautiful automobile on an entire school, man; those motherfuckers over at Lincoln High got the blame. And they got their ass beat at the big football game the next night.
Anyhow, some call Jeff Spicoli a legend. Some call him the hero of our time. But we’re just going to call him STUFF STONERS LIKE.
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