BREAKING NEWS–Oaksterdam Police Find Pot Plants in Flaming Fortune Cookie Factory

Yep, allegedly there were at least 1,000 unharmed (for now) marijuana plants found inside the abandoned factory (the previous owners were kicked-out last year) and according to Sg. Rich Vierra, who must be well-versed in summing up the value of weed, the plants are worth $500,000. And, he also says the small blaze was sparked by an electrical malfunction from the use of an old power line outside the building used to run the lights, ventilation, and irrigation systems. Oh yeah, and the growers are no where to be found…and, uhm…, uh…we know nothing.