Stoners Like Tivo

stoners like tivoDon’t you just hate distractions? Well, stoners do too, man! When a stoner is high…nothing is more annoying than a knock at the door. Why? Because it might be the cops! Just kiddin’. Well, stoners hate that knock at the door because it means they gotta get up, answer the fuckin’ door, tell the 2 Mormons on the other side to fuck off…and that means they’ll miss all the action on TV. When it comes to watching the tube, it’s as important to catch all the clues on Celebrity Mole as it is to keep a bowl packed. With that said, Tivo was totally invented for stoners…no question ’bout it. The automagical ability to stop and rewind live television is really important to the stoned. Okay maybe “really important” is an overstatement.  So, to the stoned Tivo is like “whoa totally fucking trippy, man”

“Hey, man…did you just see that…did Bobby Brady’s bell bottoms bulge as he was kissin’ all up on Millicent? What did KITT just instruct Michael Knight to do with that friggin’ grappling hook? Holy shit, man…did you see the zoomers on that hot green chick that Captain Kirk just felt up? Did that Camaro really flip down that embankment and land on its wheels without Ponch or John noticing?” These are just of few of the vitally important questions stoners have on an hourly basis while smoking a joint in front of the boob toob.

tivo is stuff stoners like
Stoners like Tivo because it magically stops time

Well, those inquiries and “Did she just say that in as little as six weeks or was it 8 weeks, that I can become a dental hygienist?”

With the advent of Tivo…all the stoner has to do is hit that li’l 10 second rewind button and voila…they’ll be instantly reassured that they too can become a medical front office assistant in just 6 weeks!

With Tivo stoners can take the time to look for that smoldering roach they just dropped in between the couch cushions and not miss a second of Mama’s Family. Go change that bong water, Drew Carey will wait…just hit pause and that big fucking obnoxious showcase showdown wheel will wait for you. Oh, and if you missed that chick bouncing up and down as she was running to her spot on bidders’ row…you know the one…that MILF with the floppy boobs spilling out all over the place…just hit rewind and there they are again.

Yep, with Tivo a stoner can roll a joint and never miss the great deals on the newest Domino’s Pizza commercial again. Tivo…It’s a stoner dream come true.



8 Responses to “Stoners Like Tivo”

  1. Baschive

    I dont even have cable let alone tivo.

  2. Lemmy

    What is this viola that the author is on about? Why does the author keep on mentioning the musical instrument the viola?

    Or does he mean the French word voila!

    Hehe stoner trying to sound smart fail.

  3. admin

    Hey, man, that rules! Could you, like, edit the rest of our blog for us? We can’t pay ya…but we’ll work something out.

  4. sitesuxxx

    this site is sooo horrible it makes me want to vomit all over my computer screen.

  5. admin

    Luckily, we’ve got lots of wet naps to help you clean up. Do you still live at:

    Address: 141 w jackson blvd.
    Address: suite #1135
    City: Chicago
    StateProv: IL
    PostalCode: 60098
    Country: US

  6. RelaxSRH

    Indoor growing equipment

  7. Rene Wojtczak

    Thank you for posting this awesome blog. Visit my own!

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