People have all sorts of rituals. Stoners are people too. And, they have a lot of rituals. Those rituals usually center around the type of paraphernalia a stoner likes to use to consume cannabis. And if you haven’t noticed, stoners love that shit, man. They love everything about it. I mean they like to collect it, to use it, to talk about it all the fucking time. Have you ever talked to a stoner about their paraphernalia? It’s like watching a fucking episode of the Antiques Road Show, man. They get all sentimental about their shit. “I smoked my first bowl out of this pipe in jr. high school, man”. You can learn a lot about a stoner by peeking into their stash box to see just what sort of tool they use. Let’s stereotype some stoners right now, shall we?
Let’s take a look at those stoners who prefer joints as their fave means of smoking. Joints are rad. They’re super old-school—since like…native times, man. So joints get some style points right off the bat because that shit’s the o.g. The method is a li’l stale, I mean that shit peaked in the 70’s, but there are some serious purists out there that keep joints alive. Now, these guys need to chop up their weed into tiny li’l-ass pieces, right? And, that’s commonly done with those little nose hair-clippin’ scissors on top of a copy of Frampton Comes Alive. So there ya go: paraphernalia! Sure, it’s a really quick and convenient way to get hi, but there ins’t a whole lot of paraphernalia involved; papers, scissors, Frampton covers, roach clips…nothing too fancy. But, a lot of stoners will tell you that it’s surely the most effective way to get hi. This method is total bargain basement cost-effective too.
There are those who prefer glass. They’ll tell you it’s the best way to get hi too. Glass is expensive, so it’s usually for the stoners who can afford and appreciate green bud. Think about The Wolf in Pulp Fiction, remember when he tasted Tarantino’s coffee and grinned? He knew that was some good shit in his cup. Glass-using stoners are like Mr. Wolf…they know good shit. Those joint dudes, well, they aren’t as discriminating. So, yeah, glass…it comes in all sorts of shapes and sizes and it’s super colorful and well, it’s art.
Then there are the guys who don’t even smoke weed…they vaporize it. That’s like high-tech stoner shit, man. Paper is technology, I mean it’s like man-made and so is glass…but this is some Star Trek-tech type shit. So instead of burning up weed, which creates carcinogens, those nasty cancer causing agents, you hit the weed with some super hot air. And, because thc, the chemical that gets ya hi, has a low smoking point it vaporizes at a low temperature. Since there aren’t any carcinogens these stoners’ll tell ya that this is definitely the best way to get hi. And, well…if you can afford it…maybe they’re right.