The USA Was Conceived by STONERS

Joe Snow 2The USA Was Conceived by STONERS. Our current president was a stoner and once said “I inhaled frequently. That was the point”. It’s widely known that our Declaration of Independence was written on hemp paper and according to that long-haired dude in Dazed and Confused good ol’ George Washington, the first president of our great nation “absolutely toked weed, are you kiddin’ me, man? He grew fields of that stuff, man, that’s what I’m talkin’ about. Fields. He grew it all over the country, man. He had people growin’ it all over the country, you know. The whole country back then was gettin’ high. Lemme tell you, man, ’cause he knew he was onto somethin’, man. He knew that it would be a good cash crop for the southern states, man, so he grew fields of it, man.”

Slater’s most likely right, man. George probably dug smoking weed and so did several other founding fathers…so let’s check the facts and honor those notable presidential stoners!

George Washington famously said: “Make the most of the Indian hemp seed, and sow it everywhere!” Sure, he realized it was a kick-ass supercrop. He realized it’s value and in 1762, his hometown of Virginia awarded bounties for growing weed and not only that they imposed stiff penalties on those who didn’t! But, we’re claiming that George liked to get high, not just make rope and soap and shit.

Anyone who’s grown weed or even smoked a li’l will tell ya that those pesky seeds make terrible smoke. Sinsimilla, the Spanish word for without seeds is a highly potent marijuana from female plants specially tended and kept seedless by preventing pollination in order to induce a high resin content. The only real reason to remove seeds and to seek out female weed is to smoke it and we’ve got record that George did just that.

May 12-13 1765: “Sowed Hemp at Muddy hole by Swamp.”

August 7, 1765: “–began to seperate (sic) the Male from the Female Hemp at Do–rather too late.”

There’s all sorts of information in his diary that proves evidence that he liked to smoke weed recreationally and medicinally. You don’t think those fuckin’ wooden teeth didn’t hurt? C’mon…weed was asprin back then.

“Some of my finest hours have been spent sitting on my back veranda, smoking hemp and observing as far as my eye can see,” wrote Thomas Jefferson. This cat was an aficionado of weed and grew massive amounts of it on his plantation and is credited with the phrase in the Declaration of Independence, “Life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.” While envoy to France, this dude went to great expense and took a huge risk to himself and his secret agents to procure particularly good weed seeds smuggled illegally into Turkey from China. The Chinese Mandarins (political rulers) so valued their hemp seed that they made its exportation a capital offense.

James Madison was such a stoner that while stoned he conceived of the idea to create a new and democratic nation! So you see…honoring our presidents and their stoned vision of creating a great democratic nation is just another way to honor our precious herb. Anyhow, happy Presidents Day from Stuff Stoners Like.

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