Win This Bluetooth Speaker By Promising Never To Listen to Coldplay

Bluetooth SpeakerWin a Bluetooth Speaker

Bluetooth speakers are stuff stoners like. Why? We’ll tell ya why. It’s because stoners like music. And because we’ve got a dope bluetooth speaker to give away from soundmonkeyaudio. But this ain’t just any run-of-the-mill bluetooth speaker. This one’s waterproof. So just in case you accidentally trip over your bong and spill nasty bong water all over this thing during a party—it’ll be fine. The bong? Who knows.

Check it out dude, some of the best bluetooth speakers on the market, shit like an overpriced bose bluetooth speaker ain’t even waterproof, man. Spill bong water on that thing and it’s toast. But this one’s waterproof and it’s free. How cool is that? So if you’ve ever wanted a bluetooth shower speaker—win this thing, put it in your bathroom, promise to never listen to Coldplay and you’ve got one. Wait? What was that about Coldplay? You read that right, but hang on, we’ll get to that.

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How’s this bluetooth speaker sound? Well we paired it with an iphone to try it out. Played a li’l reggae through it while rolling a joint a few minutes ago. And guess what? It sounded pretty awesome. Nice bass, great high. Plus we we’re pleasantly surprised how loud it got.

Coldplay SUCKS
To win this bluetooth speaker promise to never listen to Coldplay

Coldplay Sucks

Any type of music will probably sound pretty cool in this thing as long as it’s not Coldplay. Seriously, don’t even try it. This bluetooth speaker is meant to bring joy to the world, not spread noise pollution. So If you win it you’re strictly forbidden from playing any Coldplay though it. You can play country music, Yanni, whatever the fuck you want to hear as long as it ain’t Coldplay. Actually in order to win this thing you’ll have to agree to never listen to Coldplay. Never ever. Like if Coldplay is hosting Saturday Night Live, you’ll have to watch something else. Or smash your TV. Say like if Coldplay suddenly comes on the radio while you’re on a windy mountain road, you’ll have to change the station or jump out of your vehicle while it’s moving and let it fly off a cliff. Telling you, man. You win and there’s absolutely no Coldplay. We clear on that?

Anyhow this bluetooth speaker is perfect for the beach, boat, on your kitchen sink—wherever you wanna rock out without worrying about getting wet. And it can be yours on Friday at 4:20 West Coast time. We’ll also throw in a pack of Stuff Stoners Like Rolling Papers and stickers. How do you win? Follow the directions below, dude:


  1. Like our Facebook Page, follow us on Twitter, Instagram or sign up for our newsletter.
  2. Leave a comment below telling us that you will never listen to Coldplay for the rest of your life.

We’ll pick 1 random winner at 4:20 West Coast time on Friday, September 18 and contact ’em via email. Good luck.

*Must be at least 18-years of age, have love for weed and hate for Coldplay to enter.

**If you want to sponsor our giveaway shipping costs get in touch? Contact link is above. We’ll give you a shout for every contest you support.

49 Responses to “Win This Bluetooth Speaker By Promising Never To Listen to Coldplay”

  1. cal

    I hate coldplay, I even have a bumper sticker displaying my dismay for that horrendous group of people making noise .

  2. Mikey A.

    I promise to never listen to that horrible band coldplay, for the rest of my days! 😀 Speaker looks awesome!!

  3. cal

    So I guarantee you I will never listen to coldplay in my life

  4. Jet

    I have always hated Coldplay it started back with the song Yellow. Never really had a thing for Brits, but don’t tell them that But. I think Lorde is cool. XD

  5. Daniel

    Never will Coldplay be played on this speaker. Nothing will be listened to exempt “Wrecking Ball”.

  6. Goxxer750BLJ

    Coldplay???? Who the hell is that??? Oh it’s that crappy noise that some people try to call music. Not listening to them now or ever.

  7. Jim Kimes

    I promise to never ever listen to coldplay whoever that is

  8. Russell Anderson

    I promise to make sure I’ll never listen to coldplay ever again If I win this even if it comes on when checking out music sites or radio
    If it comes on I’ll be use to turn it off or change the station

  9. Tim Groves

    I will never listen to Coldplay ever, ever, again! I only listen to Stoner Metal.

  10. Dakota

    i promise not to listen to coldplay and mostly listen to pink floyd

  11. Cory

    I just wanna rep some SSL and bump some tunes 🙂

  12. The EJG

    Never even heard of them lads, must be a Brit thing init

  13. Matthewbrice

    I will never listen to Coldplay

  14. Chris Coomer

    I swear, with every fiber of my being, that not once will I listen to the abomination that is Coldplay in this lifetime .

  15. Charles p

    I promise to never listen to cold play and if i do may my eardrums.

  16. Charles p

    I promise to never listen to cold play and if i do may my eardrums fall from my head.

  17. Erin Adams

    i promise to never listen to coldplay for the rest of my days…

  18. Anissa

    I promise I will never listen to Coldplay !! Never ever ever!

  19. Anthony

    I promise I will never listen to coldplay ! Fuck Coldplay!

  20. Gerald

    TherwThere’s nothing that would make me listen to Coldplay, if you threatened to harm my family if I didn’t listen, I would have some seriously fucked up family members

  21. Jason

    Hahahaha Coldplay just got shit on by you guys hahahaha. I promise never too listen to Coldplay threw this awesome sauce speaker, (cross my heart hope too die, stick a needle in my eye) that’s how much I promise haha. Well good luck guys stay high 😀 PEACE!!

  22. Prof BT

    I never have not will I start listening to Coldplay.

  23. Blayne

    Never liked Coldplay, I promise to never listen to them, speaker or not lol

  24. Count Dabula

    If i win the speaker i promise I’ll never listen to coldplay, they suck ass. I’ll make sure i play lots of stoner metal and reggae…. and I’m talking about real reggae, not bullshit white people reggae. I’ve really been wanting a bluetooth shower radio.

  25. randyg

    i havent yet , why start now ? yes i would like to win !

  26. Essedik

    I’m just tryna blast really loud porn at public libraries on the go.

  27. Austin

    I solemnly swear to never listen to coldplay. Beats a phone speaker when recording! live forever smoke weed, everof ekilsrenotsffuts

  28. Eric

    As long as im alive, Coldplay will never been played. ESPECIALLY if i win these awesome speakers!

  29. Inti

    I dislike Coldplay as much as I do his pretentious ex-wife. I promise to never soil the delicate workings of this awesome speaker with this brit’s incessant whining.

  30. June Ebinger


  31. Janet


  32. SwissCheeseDan

    I have Never played any Coldplay on any of my devices, I believe it instantly invalidates any warranty, as im sure no manifaturer would sanction their product to be used in such a foul, antisocial and altogether tasteless activity.

  33. Melanie M

    I PINKY promise that as long as I am pumping oxygen through my lungs & blood through my heart, my precious ears will never hear the terrible noise that comes from Coldplay. Coldplay blows & I am just doing myself a favor by promising to never listen to them again! 😀

    Plus, I have more important & relevant artists that I can’t wait to pump through that Bluetooth speaker while I have a private concert in my shower! Because, you know, the speaker and waterproof & I can. ;b

    PS- Happy Friday my stoner friends (:

  34. Melanie M

    ^^ edit** the speaker IS** waterproof & I can (:

  35. Anthony M

    You said it had nice bass, coldplay isn’t about that bass.

  36. pope

    I vow never to listen to cold play !

  37. Ross

    Followed and posted never listening to Coldplay. Even got a rule to delete Coldplay from iTunes.

  38. SycoNot

    This one’s easy. I don’t listen to Coldplay anyway. Or Nickelback for that matter. If I win this speaker, I promise to continue to not listen to these bands.

  39. shayna

    I will not listen to coldplay.. ever

  40. Anonymous

    Last night I was out with the pals and I thought Coldplay was playing so I commented on how lame they are and listening to them was. Immediately I was told that they are actually pretty good and no one agreed with the fact that I was dissing them. Still that didn’t stop me from laughing at the fact that they were all defending them and I stood by my word. This morning I wake up and see this glorious post on Instagram and am quite fond of the fact that this is being promoted. SO with that said I solemnly swear this speaker will play NO Coldplay not even if it was the end of the world and the only way I could save humanity was if I played a Coldplay soundtrack. No just no. I refuse. EVER.

    Sincerely, a proud and loyal gal who is happy there are others that think Coldplay is lame as fugg. 🙂

  41. Andrea

    I was so excited about posting my comment i forgot to add my email lolol.

  42. Remrich420

    I promise & SWEAR to not only NEVER listen to “Coldplay” but I promise to turn Coldplay off wherever &whenever I hear that BULLSHIT !!!! Thank you…….

  43. Anna

    I don’t think cold play should even be known as people who make music. They just bang things together and hope for the best, it sounds groos, its disrespectful to the original rock and rollers who had to work hard to get people to even consider.

  44. Careuhmel


  45. Character zero

    I will never listen to Coldplay again for the rest of my life!

  46. Curtisophigus

    I have never knowingly or willingly listened to Coldplay, nor would I ever start now, and that I promise. However, I cannot wait to hear some Joss Stone through my new bluetooth speaker!

  47. RM

    Coldplay sounds like an std. Promise never to listen.

  48. Anonymous

    Who in the hell is Coldplay I don’t listen to that kind of crap!!!!!!!!!

  49. Frank

    I don’t like Coldplay they suck!!!!!!! Their music sucks

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